A Whisper to a Scream
by huneydew19
Summary: Something happens to Sam, will she ever remember, who was it that she was with that night, will she ever tell Carly, will this ruin her life? Diary form Please read and Review! Not a one shot will write more ch's
1. Chapter 1

An: this is my first iCarly fanfiction, I hope you enjoy Whisper to a scream.

Chapter 1: poor thing

_**"It happens to everyone, you say how sad, you say poor thing.  
You will never believe the nightmares.  
You will never know the pain you caused.  
You will never see the scares you left.  
The things you stole, everything lost."**_

_[flashback]  
* October 21, 2008*  
It was a late day in October and all I remember was bored out of my mind at Carly's house, her and Spencer were at a wedding and weren't coming home until late.  
I sat on her couch eating ham and watching 'girly cow', it was the only thing that helped my boredom go away.  
I fell asleep at about 7pm and woke up in a strange place not being able to see, but the stench that was coming into my nose was the foulest smell by far. My eyes were blurry and once they focused I noticed I was in a room, not any random room it was a hotel room. 'who was I with?' i thought.  
I also noticed I was naked, I had a terrible headache, maybe I was hung over but I don't remember drinking.  
A person came through the door it was a man, I noticed but I couldn't see his face. 'who is that' I thought .  
My eyes widened when I saw who it was, my jaw dropped, I couldn't believe it, I couldn't believe who it was._

_[end of flashback]_

_

* * *

_December 13, 2008.  
I woke up in a flash, trying to remember the horrific night that was only two months ago. I felt warm sweat on my face.  
I got up and went into my bathroom and splashed my face with cold water and looked at my pale face. I sighed and felt different then I had just two months ago.  
I went back to my room and looked at the alarm clock it flashed 5:02 am, I rubbed my eyes and put on a coat knowing I couldn't fall back asleep.  
I decided to take a walk, I walked to my best friend, Carly Shay's , apartment. It was very early in the morning and quite cold for the middle of winter.  
I put my ipear pod in my hears and listen to music while I walked, it didn't take long before I got there. I ran up to her floor and began to knock on her door.  
Of course Spencer, Carly's older brother, answered the door in his boxer none the less. A smile crept on my face when I saw his duck boxers, "Hi i couldn't sleep can i crash here?" I spoke quietly.  
Spencer looked at me and nodded while yawning at the same time, I walked into their cozy apartment and crept into Carly's big room, "Carly?" I said shaking her a small bit.  
"Hm?!" she groaned still sleeping, "Carly, wake up" I said shaking her a bit more but rougher. "I'm awake," she spoke, "what are you doing here?" she wondered.  
I starred at her with my big blue eyes pleading for help, "I had another nightmare," Carly sat up on her bed and patted next to her for me to come on the bed next to her. I hopped on her bed and looked at her, "What happened in the nightmare?" she asked waiting for a response, "I was in the room and I woke up naked, and I guy came in the room," tears welled up in my eyes.  
I gulped and then looked at her, "I'm so sorry," she hugged me tight, "everything will be alright, I promise." she ensured me, "thank you," I hugged her tight and then slept the rest of the night peacefully.

* * *

I remember that night it went from a whisper to a scream, I try to remember more each night.  
It seems like my mind repressed all the memories, and when they're ready to come out whether I am ready or not, they'll be painful.  
I hope I can get through this, with the help of my friends and family. I wish it never happened even though I can't remember how it happened, it did.  
Oh I never introduced myself, I am Sam, Samantha Puckett. A tall blonde with blue eyes, and a co-host of the video cast "icarly." I like doing them with my two best friends.  
I live on my own, my mother is always to busy for me, and my twin sister, Melanie, goes to a fancy boarding school.  
I like to pick on nubs and I am pretty aggressive, and I am not good with school, I don't take bull for anything. My soft side may come out soon enough, who knows.  
Anything is possible, and when I want to I can be an okay person, just a sarcastic teenager, well this is the end of my journey today, I will write later, or tomorrow.  
night all.

Sam.

* * *

An: I hope you liked the first chapter, It is not based on anything but the journal like writing is pretty cool writing style.  
I will write more soon. :D


	2. Chapter 2

A Whisper to a Scream

Chapter 2: My Immortal

_**These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real There's just too much that time cannot erase When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears And I held your hand through all of these years But you still have all of me.**_

_**

* * *

**_December 14, 2008

Last time I left you, you found out who I am, and you only know part of my story.  
You will learn more about me as time progresses, as memories are coming back.  
I only remember very little, and I haven't told anyone what is really going on through my mind.  
I wish to remember, I hope to remember, soon enough I will.

* * *

I woke up today in Carly's bed, remembering coming at her house in the middle of morning.  
I looked next to me to see if she was there and there was no teenage girl there.  
I stretched and got out of bed still in my pajamas from yesterday. I didn't have anymore nightmares the rest of the night. I was glad, it seemed that Carly and being with her, with my best friend, made me feel so much better. I looked at the alarm next to her cozy bed and it flashed in green, 10:35 a.m.  
I yawned and made myself get up and went into the living room area, there I saw Spencer standing there, this time fully clothed, making what smelled like the smell reached my nose I felt like I was going to be sick, before I even said 'hello' to Spencer.I headed towards the bathroom and felt better when I was finished hurling, I went back to the kitchen and said," where's carls?" to Spencer."She went see if Freddie was going to school with you ladies." He grinned and I gave him a weird look."Speaking of the devil herself," he smiled as Carly walked in wearing a nice top with a black jean, "Hi Sam, feeling better?" she asked concerned.  
I look at her and smile, feeling my stomach growl made me walk over to her brother and I asked just for bacon, you know me and my love for pork!"I am fine," I lied feeling like a truck just hit me, "Where's Fredweird?", I ask stuffing a piece of bacon into my mouth. "He's going to meet us there his mom wants to give him a flea bath."I laugh, feeling bad for that nubs mom treats him like that, "haha, okay," I smile, "Bacon?" I shakes her head and gets her books ready for school. I sit down and turn on the TV and saw Barney was on so I switched the TV and saw the news._Today's news, four girls have gone missing, there is a party search looking for them if you have any contact where they are please call 1-888-555-5555_**(An:not a real number)**I sigh thinking about those poor people,'was I one of those people a couple months ago' I thought trying not to worry to much or over stimulate my turned off the TV and helped me off the couch, "ready to go Sam?" I nodded going out the door, "Bye Spencer, and hey no more duckies," I looked at me and shot me a weird look, "what was that about?" I laughed, "don't ask," I replied smiling wide.

* * *

At school I walked to my locker looking at all the people well guys in school, wondering whom that mystery guy was from my nightmare.I shook off that feeling that worried me, I opened my locker and found a note that read: 'I hope you know, just who I am, from one plus one takes two to think'I was confused at what that meant, "hm," I said, "what?" said a voice that came from behind me, I jumped, "Carly!", I looked at her and looked at the note then back at her,"Can you help me with something Carls?", I asked nicely,she nodded "Wait a minute," I said spotting Gibby and running towards the chubby kid, "Come here you Nub,"I gave him one of my famous atomic wedgies, "thanks" I whispered in his ear, "I needed that." I smiled leaving him be and walking back over to my friend. "okay I found this note."I handed her the note, as she read it, it looked like she was confused also, "what does this person mean?" she questioned me, "I have not a clue," I replied.  
I shrugged and took the note back from her and put it in my locker, "so what are we going to do on ICarly today?" I wondered, I also thought 'i haven't seen Fredork today'I smelled some gross stench and ran to the bathroom before Carly could finish,'this is the second time today I felt like this' I thought,It seemed odd.  
"Sam you okay?" I hear a familiar friend's voice, "No I'm not," I replied vomiting again, I decided to go home and rest thinking it's just the stomach flu.

* * *

I got a ride home from the bus and laid down, I laid on the couch and yawned putting a blanket over me, that's when things got black.

_[Flashback/dream]_

_I felt cold waking up on the bed, to find I was naked made me feel like I may have done something I regret.  
I put the blanket over me reaching for my bra, 'why would I be naked' I thought.  
I started to put my clothes on when the doorknob shook, I felt pain in my legs so I sat down on the bed,  
The door opened and I saw a figure of black, my head still hurt as if I was drinking and had a hangover.  
I looked to the shadow and tried so hard to make it out, I squinted my eyes, "Sam, your awake," I knew that voice.  
'who was it' I thought, the voice I know it but can't make it out. "It's okay Sam, your beautiful."  
This bugged me so much not knowing who he was, why wouldn't he step into the light to reveal himself?  
"who are you?" I asked pleadingly, "oh you know who I am you know exactly who I am." I looked at him trying to figure this out.  
He finally stepped into the light, and brushed his hand upon my cheek._

_[end of Flashback/dream]_

_

* * *

_ I woke up on the couch feeling a little hot, I took my temperature and it read 98.5 normal, 'probably the blankets' I thought.I sat on my couch that I just lay in, thinking hard who this guy what, 'why is it so hard to remember?' I wondered.I sighed feeling hungry, making a ham and bacon sandwich, I smiled smelling the fumes of the meat. "yum,"I said out loud. I finished my sandwich and put the dish in the kitchen sink, a small knock came to my door wondering who it couldn't of been past 11 o'clock, I looked at the time and it read, 2:30 p.m. School just got out so it couldn't of been Carly or though Freddie hasn't been in school all day, or has he? I hesitated before answering the door.I looked and smiled, happy it wasn't the person I dreamt about. Or is it?

* * *

Today was a very interesting day indeed, first Freddie went missing, I got a note, My dream, and now a mysterious person at my door.  
I just hope that things will work out and that each day I get to remember more.  
I shall write tomorrow and you can see if I remember more.

Sam.

**AN: that's Chapter two, quite mysterious huh? who do you think the person is? give me feed back and hey remember to review!!!!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: sorry been busy like really busy and have had writers block!! So here is my update.**

Chapter 3: Scars

**_ I tear my heart open,  
I sew myself shut.  
My weakness is, that I can't do much.  
And our scars remind us,  
that the past is real.  
I tear my heart open, just to feel._**

* * *

December 15,2008

I can't believe who was at the door after a day missing school, so unlike him,"Freddork!" I said smirking at the dweb who

was now standing in front of me with his arms crossed. He looked at me with his mouth gaped open, my house, a tad bit more

wealthy looking then others. "Don't say a word, but what do you want that you had to come to my house?" his eyes shifted back

to me, shock was written all over his face, my smirk widened. "Well I needed todays homework, since I wasn't at school," he

said looking at me with a big smile, kind of freaking me out to big. "I was only in school for a while, I was erm sick." I

said feeling a bit gross still thinking about that guy in my dream, I sighed looking at him again. "Do you think Carly would

have it?" he asked, "Probably nub go bother her," I said giving him a glare. He nodded and said, "see you later?" more of a

question, "whatever." I watched him leave after my remark, I felt a tad bit sick running to the bathroom as quick as

possible.

* * *

Later that day, I went to Carly's, eating a delicious piece of ham off the bone the nub came in, I rolled my eyes at him and

sighed. Carly and her peppy self broke the silence among us, "c'mon guys ICarly time!!" she said before running up the

stairs. I starred at Freddork and lifted his shirt, "you don't say anything k?" he gulped and nodded. I went first walking up

after Carly, He soon followed. "So what are we doing today on Icarly?" I asked smiling at Carly and my contentness for ham. I

glared at Freddie and looked at her waiting for a response, "well today we're going to talk about how many hobo's we can spot

out of this window and maybe a little extra, "Why do you have such an obsession with hobo's. She retaliated, "why do you

have such an obsession with ham and fat priests?" I snarled at her and gave her a quick light shove. "So we ready?" Carly

asked we both nodded, me and Carly got in front of the camera, "ready 1 2" and he pointed at us. "Hi I'm Carly" she

said,"And I'm Sam." "and hobo's can't afford cable." I smiled, "Speaking of hobo's what are we look for Carly?" I asked

with a fake smile plastered on my face, "well Sam we're going to be counting how many hobo's we can spot out of this window."

She spoke with such a high energy tone, it seems ever since what happened a short few months ago, I have no energy or

anything like she does. I wish I did, now I have to put on a happy face until I figure out what had happened that night.

"Sounds good," I said running to the window with a pair of binoculars, Carly soon followed, and Freddork followed with the

camera. Carly smiled at me thinking that something was wrong I can see it in her eyes, I just smiled back at her and then

opened the window door. "Ready?" I said, "you know it, " she replied, "oh I spot one and he is wearing a nice orange coat, "

I said smiling, "Oh there is another one, he is very handsome," Freddie looked sad when Carls said that. He knows he can't

get with her, I laugh at his pathetic obsession with her. "Oh no,there's one that found a TV remote, too bad they can't get

cable," I chuckled and Carly laughed with me. "well thats enough with that, now we have a special guest come on out." I

anticipated who it was, this is something she didn't tell us so it truly was a surprise. A guy came out, he was very

attractive looking. Brown hair, Blue eyes, tall, shaved nice, okay I lied he is Hot!! A smile came on my face a true smile

not a fake one, "This is Decklan, a friend from my summer camp," Carly said hugging her friend. I can see the jealousy on

Freddorks face, I feel satisfied. My eyes reverted to Decklan and his gorgeous eyes, 'okay Sam snap out of it girl' I

extended my hand to reach for his, and I felt butterflies, "Hi Sam," his voice was nice and manly, I have not felt like this

in a while, but I need to shake that feeling off, I have other things to worry about. We had a nice time on the rest of the

episode of ICarly, us three talked and he and Carly shared memories of camp.

* * *

"Carly can I sleep over, I need to talk to you about something that has been bothering me!" Carly nodded and lent me some

pajamas. She came back into the living room with a bowl of popcorn and a good 'girly cow' movie, I got excited. She bent her

legs Indian style, "What's up?" she said with concern in her eyes, I gulped and told her my horrific dreams and the note,

"well I have been having these dreams and flashback where I was in this room but naked and there is this mysterious guy." I

looked down then back up at her, "I also got a note the other day, from a mysterious person," I finished. She looked at me

with saddened eyes, "Did you, you know?" she asked, I shook my head, "I don't think so, I mean I keep having the same dream

but each time it cuts out who the guy is, or I can't remember who it is when I wake up." I said with a worried tone. "Well

lets get your mind off it and enjoy the night if you have a bad dream or nightmare about it I will lay on the floor next

to the couch, just wake me up." I smiled at her, "Thanks Carls," I hugged her tightly and ate some popcorn, "Bring on the

good night, do you have any ham?" Carly smiled, "Oh Sam, yeah help yourself." I went to the kitchen and got myself some more

ham on the bone, "sweet," I sat back down and watched 'Girly Cow'. I eventually fell asleep, Carly put a blanket over me and

fell asleep too.

* * *

_[dream/flashback]_

_To my surprise I was in a new place, I was on the street, with a sheet on my back cause my clothes were gone. I ran faster_

_and faster cause a shadow was following me, running after me. I don't know my surroundings, I keep the sheet up as I run, I_

_look at my surroundings and go towards a dark alley. I stop hoping to cut him/her off, they stand behind me and I tun around_

_to face them. My eyes widened,"what do you want?" I asked scared to death, "Why are you following me?" no answer. He/she_

_pushed me against the wall and started to kiss me, of course I pull back, "Stop" I pleaded, He/she continued to kiss me and I_

_closed my eyes in fear and disgust. They let me go and stopped kissing me, I slapped their face and ran as far as I could, so_

_far that I left them standing there alone in the dark. I ended up in the park alone with just a sheet on, I sat underneath a_

_tree, catching my breath and crying at the same time. I never felt more violated, I crumbled into a ball under the tree_

_feeling cold as ever and feeling alone._

_[end of flashback/dream]_

* * *

I woke up in a sweat and breathing heavy, I opened my eyes to find myself safe in Carly's house, I put my knees to my chest

and collected my thoughts all together. Carly woke up starring at me in the dark, I hadn't a clue what time it was. All I

felt was a rush of sadness, "Sam, are you okay?" I shook my head looking down at her. She came near me on the couch wrapping

her arms around me, "I had another nightmare," I sighed hugging her back, "what happened, if you don't want to talk about

thats fine too." I looked at her and took a deep breath, "well this one was different then the other ones." she listened to

me, "This one was where I was alone and on the street and someone was chasing me and I cut him off into a dark alley and they

started to kiss me." I gulped. "He kept kissing me then stopped and I ran away to a park, that was farther away, and I had no

idea where I was," Carly sensed the horrified tone in my voice. She rubbed my back, It'll be alright Sam, I promise no one

will get you here."," she said with a calm soft tone. I smiled hugging her once more, "will you still sleep near me so I

sleep well?" she nodded, "thanks for everything Carly, your truly my best friend." She smiled as did I, "Anytime Sam," She

smiled hopping back into her sleeping bag. The rest of the night I slept fine, knowing I was safe and had someone here who

knew what I was going through and willing to listen.

* * *

So that was today's journey, who is the one that is tormenting me in my dreams? Why is Freddie being so dorkish wait he

always is. lol I ponder what will lay ahead tomorrow, kinda scared to wonder. We will know then, So write more tomorrow.  
Night,

Sam.

* * *

**A/N: So there it is Chapter 3, I got my chapter done, Give me some feedback and let me know what you think is to come. And**

**how Decklan fits in the pieces. READ AND REVIEW!! (c:)**


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